We intellectually know that love is something great. But we do not know the objective meaning of love. Love is subjective reality for us - it is something about possessing and about attachment.
We use the phrase "fall in love" as if it is a fall.
Should it be a fall?
Can't we "rise in love”?
Ask yourself, have you ever experienced the real, true, innocent love in your life? Did you ever love anybody? Or did anybody love you?
Before answering this question, please read the following incidents:
True Love
It was a hectic morning, about 8:30 am, when an elderly gentleman in his 80's, arrived to see me. He stated that he was in a hurry as he had an appointment at 9:00 am.
I had him take a seat, knowing it would be over an hour before I would to able to see him. I saw him looking at his watch and felt a bit bad about it. If I were not busy with another appointment, I would have spent time with him.
While I was checking what he had written (he required me to read his article before sending it to the newspaper), we began to engage in conversation. I asked him if he had a doctor's appointment this morning, as he was in such a hurry. The gentleman told me no, and continued to say that he needed to go to the nursing home to eat breakfast with his wife.
I then inquired about her health. He told me that she had been there for a while and that she was a victim of Alzheimer Disease (a brain disorder that seriously affects a person's ability to carry out daily activities).
As we talked, and I finished reading his story, I asked if she would be worried if he was a bit late. He replied that she no longer knew who he was, that she had not recognized him in five years now.
I was surprised, and asked him. "And you still go every morning, even though she doesn't know who you are?"
He smiled as he patted my hand and said. "She doesn't know me, but I still know who she is."
I had to hold back tears as he left, I had goose bumps on my arm, and thought, "That is the kind of love I want in my life." True love is neither physical nor intellectual.
True love is an acceptance of all that is, has been, will be, and will not be.
Innocent Love
It happened sometime back. One day Adhrika, my 3 year old daughter took a sheet of costly decorative wrapping paper roll I bought to wrap a gift for my friend's wedding. I found she was busy decorating a cardboard box with it.
On seeing this, I was angry as the roll costs money and I was in realtime financial difficulty. I scolded the child for wasting money on such trifle things. The child sulked and hid the box under her toy table.
However, next day morning, Adhrika brought the box to me and said, "This is for you, Appa (Daddy)."
I was embarrassed by my previous overreaction.
But I became very angry again when I found that the box was empty. I yelled at her, "Don't you know that when you give someone a present, there's supposed to be something inside it?" (I was so unconscious that I could not think that little Adhrika cannot buy anything for me on her own)
The little girl looked up at me with tears in her eyes and said, "Oh, Appa it's not empty. I blew kisses into the box. All for you, Appa."
I was crushed. I bend down on my knees. I put my arms around my little girl and begged her forgiveness.
I have kept that gold box in my memory. Whenever I felt discouraged, I would take out an imaginary kiss and remember the love of the child who had put it there. There is nothing in this universe as precious as pure love. Nobody has ever, never, will love me like this.
In a very real sense, each of us is a parent who has been given a gold container filled with unconditional love and kisses by innocent people.
Ask yourself did you experience it?
What I wanted to say is that Love - I believe - truly makes the life go round. Without that innocent love, I won't be able to live. I don't want to live without real love.
Love and Infatuation
Following part is a quote collected from various sources:-
Infatuation is marked by a feeling of insecurity. You are excited and eager, but not genuinely happy. There are nagging doubts, unanswered questions, little bits and pieces about your beloved that you would as soon as examine too closely. It might spoil the dream.Love is the quiet understanding and mature acceptance of imperfection. It is real. It gives you strength and grows beyond you to bolster your beloved. You are warmed by their presence, even when they are away. Miles do not separate you. You have so many wonderful little films in your head that you keep replaying. But near or far, you know they are yours, and you can wait.Infatuation has an element of sexual excitement. Whenever you are together, you hope it will end in intimacy.Love is not based on sex. It is the maturation of friendship, which makes sex so much sweeter. You must be friends before you can be lovers.Infatuation lacks confidence. When they’re away, you wonder if they're cheating. Sometimes, you check.Love means trust. You are calm, secure and unthreatened. They feel your trust, and it makes them even trust worthier.Infatuation might lead you to do things you will regret, but love never steers you in the wrong direction.Love is upper. It makes you feel whole. It completes the circle. It fills the empty space in your heart. Love is elevating. It lifts you up. It makes you look up. It makes you think up. It makes you a better person than you were before. If you have love in your life, it can make up for a great many things you don't have. If there is no love in your life, whatever else there is has a lot less meaning.
